First Post!

There's quite a lot of pressure to write a first post. I haven't had to write a first post since 2002. This first post will define what follows from here on out. That's a lot of pressure to put on a first post.

I thought I'd start off doing some self-reflecting on a decision I had to make in church today. Well, not so much the decision itself, but the things that affected how I made my decision. It happened during lunch, when Monty asked me if I'd heard any gossip lately. Of course, he asked me in front of five other people, and even if I'd heard anything (which I didn't yet), I wouldn't've just blurted it in front of everyone.

The power of Gossip:
Sophomore year of college, I decided to try out Lent for the first time. A couple people around me fasted random things during Freshman year, and I wanted to see what it was like. Instead of giving up sweets or meat or mirrors, I decided to give up gossiping. Next to journaling, it was probably the best decision I've ever made. Of course it was difficult, as Spring and Love were in the air, so I edited my fast so I couldn't gossip, but people can tell me things. I've since come to realize how unproductive an activity gossiping is. People never gossip about the good things that others do; we like to gossip about who's going out with whom, he said/she said fluff, and more often than not, people get hurt, reputations tarnish, and a feeling of secrecy pervades the air. And that is not a healthy environment for church or school.

The power of Honesty:
My favorite small group leader taught me this lesson. She was my college group/small group leader for most of my college experience. Among the lessons she taught us, honesty was the biggest. I often wondered what made her such a great leader, and came to the conclusion that she was always very honest with us about herself. She didn't pretend she knew all the answers, she didn't pretend that she had it all together and was the perfect Christian girl. She told us when she struggled with xyz or when she didn't like such and such. She showed me that it's okay to be weak in front of the group, and I've tried to adopt that into my leaderosophy. I try to be honest with my youth group and talk about everything under the sun, from pumice-ing our feet to enjoying a pitcher of sangria over chocolate fondue. Boys, girls, drinking, getting annoyed at classmates and roommates; I want to show my kids that I'm not hiding anything from them, so they shouldn't hide anything from me. I also try to encourage them to talk to their parents about their boy/girl issues right from the get-go. ...They still have yet to do so...=_=;

The power of Ethics and Values:
One of my campus classes is an ethics class for educators. In class, we talk about everything from testing to GLBTQ issues, from racism to cheating. Both of my online classes have discussed about stereotyping racism/gender roles. Even though we're only 1/3 of the way through the semester, I can see how my class discussions are already shaping my worldview. Now I think about things and ask myself, "Is this ethical?" Many times, I don't know the answer. Ultimately, it isn't the Yes or No that's important; what's important is the struggle and how we arrive at our answer.

"Have you heard of any gossip lately?" 
"No. Tell me!" 
"I hear that E and D are dating." 
"Oh....ok. I'll try to confirm that."

Gossiping is not good. Dating in secret is not good. I dug around and got to the bottom of today's gossip, but not because I wanted to know. It's so I can be sure of the facts, instead of going off of assumptions and hearsay. This way, I can be there for my girl if and when things go sour. I don't like that I found out through the grapevine.

People should just be open and honest with each other. I will be.